Twelve days of xmas

Tis the season bla bla bla........

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me.......
....a jumper that didn't fit.
On the second day of Christmas my true love and me........
............had a row over it.
On the third day of Christmas my true love said to me........
...."why are you so miserable?"
On the forth day of Christmas my true love went for me......
...............with a kitchen stool.
On the fifth day of Christmas my true love couldn't see........
...any reason to stay.
On the sixth day of Christmas my true love packed her things
........and went away.
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me......
......her wedding ring.
On the eight day of Christmas my true love gave to me..........
.....absolutely nothing.
On the ninth day of Christmas my true love wrote to me.........
......asking for a divorce
On the tenth day of Christmas I sent her my reply...................
..........it said "of course"
On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love came back........
.......but only to get some more things
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love isn't here.............

And the telephone never rings