Friday, 6 September 2019



My wife said to me
Somewhat anxiously
I’m very much in love
With you today
And I want a word with you
Tell me do you love me too
So I answered
In a reassuring way

Does honey come from bees
Do squirrels climb up trees
Do turtles nest
And lay eggs on the beach
Are the Rolling Stones a band
Does the universe expand
Did George the sixth
Have problems with his speech

Does Hamilton race cars
Did Churchill smoke cigars
Are quarks the smallest
Objects known to science
Did Lawrence ride a camel
Is a killer whale a mammal
Was Ghandi jailed for
Passive non-compliance

Are rhinoceroses rare
Is Bill Gates a Billionaire
Was Pennywise a demon
In disguise
Was Biggie Smalls a rapper
Is a WC a crapper
Do flies eat shit
Have spiders got eight eyes

Was Al Capone a Mobster
Did Dali paint a lobster
Does Grayson Perry
Sometimes wear a dress
Was George Elliot female
Did Sir Francis Drake set sail
Are there strawberries and
Meringues in Eton Mess

Have banks done dodgy deals
Do polar bears eat seals
Do British trains get
Cancelled due to snow
Did Caligula lose the plot
Does a Bentley cost a lot
Was Trotsky taken out
In Mexico

Are battery hens abused
Was Victoria unamused
Did Sally Gunell win
Olympic gold
Are the icecaps in decline
Does a grape grow on a vine
Are the pyramids of
Giza very old

Do fruit trees flower in spring
Could Pavarotti sing
Did David Bailey
Take a photograph
Are the seas and rivers wet
Does Las Vegas take a bet
Did Gandalf face
The Balrog with his staff

Was Philip born in Greece
Did Theresa cut the police
Did Cameron shag a pig’s
Head in a club
Does Tiger Woods play golf
Should kids keep away from Rolf
Did Mufasa die
When Simba was a cub

Is the pope a catholic
Is Titanium metallic
Was Kasparov 
Much good at playing chess
Is calamari squid
Would you like a million quid
Do I love you darling

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