The angry gammons

The angry gammons

The angry gammons gandered

The gabbling gammon man

He gabbled and they gargled  

With gladness and élan

With gratuitous grandiosity 

He gave the gathered clan

The grandest and the greatest

Most glamorous golden plan

How greedily they grabbed

Every garishly garnished groat

How eagerly they heard

Every ghastly grumbling note

How gullibly they believed

The ignorant grating goat

They gladly gave him governance

How gleefully they gloat

The angry gammons cheered

As he gusted “Now we can

Guard against the Gauchos

With a Wall gargantuan

Give guns to all good Christians

Grotesque Muslims we will ban

Garrotte the girly snowflakes

Get ghastly with Iran”

The gabbling gammon man

Gazed at the gaping crowd

 And faux graciously he gabbed

In a voice grotesque and loud

“All the world’s a golf course

 And the gutless will be cowed”

And the gushing gammons gasped

Glazed glorious great and proud